This is an excerpt of a satirical tech column I sometimes write for The 405 – click the link below to read the whole thing.
This week started pretty well for Apple – the run up to the release of the iPhone 5s and 5c saw hundreds of their most loyal customers take camp outside Apple stores with an aching in their loins for fingerprint technology and 64 megabits. The queues fueled the usual stories in the press. Who are these geeks asked the Telegraph like it’s still 2001 and nerd glasses and geek culture isn’t actually a celebrity endorsed fashion empire…
I’ve always had somewhat of an ambiguous attitude to the Encounters Short Film Festival, which has taken place in the city of Bristol once a year for the last 19 years.
I’m a fan of the short film, I enjoy sitting in a darkened and otherwise quiet room when all gets a little too much. Whether that’s hiding in the corner under a blanket with a cup of coffee watching A Field in England at this year’s End of the Road Festival, or escaping to the press room – where lights are compellingly dimmed – at almost every single conference on game development I’ve been too as I try to escape both the talks, and a hangover. Stranger still, I’ve never been a games writer.
I journeyed over to Cardiff to catch US psych/folk band Akron/Family support their new album ‘Sub-Verses’. I’ve seen them a handful of times now, and somehow manage to catch them along the way on other travels. I’ve seen them in Denmark, Canada, England and now Wales. Because everyone knows it counts as an entirely different country. Every time has been completely different – they’re an entirely unpredictable band both on record and in live form – I hope I got this across in the review. Have a read…
The last few times they’ve come through Bristol we’ve been asked to support them. So once again I’m doing a bit of promo and got a little over excited and wrote my first meeting with the band in to a short story. Is it a fictionalised account? Well, as I think you’ll notice – it’s impossible to tell.
Here’s the full piece, with the promotional blurb too… obviously.
The ‘anticipation’ is ‘hotting up’ due to ‘feverish speculation’ as we prepare for the ‘expected launch’ of the new Apple iPhone today.
Or in other words – because every visiting executive, courier and pizza boy coming out of Apple’s factories in China appears to have been gifted with a comprehensive press release with a list of new features, we’re going to be seeing a premium model – the 5s, and a cheaper model, the 5c.